There's a name in the business that describes a particular type 

of client that strikes fear and loathing in the hearts of even the 

most battle hardened business veterans. They're called 


The term "Garmento" originates from the Garment District in 

Manhattan -- a five block area where everyday thousands of 

garment manufacturers "hondle" their way through business 

deals. A typical hondle might sound something like this:

Seymour: So Eli, how are things in the button business?

Eli: Oye, don't ask. My putz assistant overstocked me with 

buttons. I have so many buttons, you won't believe!

Seymour: And this is what you call to let me?

Eli: I call to tell you you're a lucky man. Because I have problem,
you're a lucky man. This kills me but I'll let you have my buttons for
just 3 cents a button. I know it's hard to believe, but I'm sure you'll

find some way to thank me later. I won't ask for much.

Seymour: You're joking right? Eli, don't joke with me. 3 cents a 

button? I can get them from my cousin Marty for a penny! I'll tell 

you what, I'll check with my brother and see what I can do for you. 

I really don't need buttons, but maybe I can take them off your

hands for a penny a half. I can't promise.

1997 John Follis. All rights reserved.